The Thing About Dandelions
or, when garden-lessons become life-lessons (this happens to me so much!!!🤣)
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The homestead is awash in ground-sunshine, born on the innumerable petals of one of the most prolific, recognizable, and often-maligned wildflowers in the world.
I kneel in the warm dirt and grasp the bundle of dandelion leaves tightly. I wiggle and pull until I’ve fully dislodged the long, sturdy root from the garden bed. I pry with a trowel if necessary, because if I leave behind any little broken root-fragment, the dandelion will enthusiastically grow right back again, and it doesn’t belong here!
It does belong lots of other places on the homestead. I quite like dandelions! They bloom early, and then they just don’t stop blooming. Wave upon wave of smile-inducing sunshine yellow, bejeweling all sorts of improbable spaces, gathering symphonies of buzzing insects into a sunny-day soundtrack that I enjoy on repeat.
And they’re incredibly edible! I’ve picked fresh golden blossoms and brewed tea. I’ve sautéed dandelion greens for dinner. And (most amazing in my opinion) I’ve scrubbed and sun-dried roots to roast and grind for coffee!
And dandelion seeds are, objectively, unarguably, simply fun. A flower that transforms into an entire globe of gossamer parachutes that you can launch with a gentle breath into a warm summer breeze? What an amazing idea, sign me up!
I have lived in suburban neighborhoods where the sight of a child blowing a dandelion would launch every nearby adult yard-maintainer into slow-motion running-dives of “NOOOOOOO!” 🤣 I get it, dandelions are a formidable opponent to manicured grasses everywhere, but what have we become if we can resist parachute-fluff-wish-engines growing out of the earth?
So, I am absolutely a dandelion fan. But their exuberance can be pretty overwhelming to other plants. So we also have to diligently protect the spaces we are cultivating from the eager advances of the dandelion multitudes :)
And, you know
(I reflect to myself as I grip another dandelion and wriggle it free from crumbly spring dirt)
this used to be a lot harder work.
I am a person who experiences strong emotions and intrusive thoughts. I’ve been this way for as long as I can remember, though I definitely didn’t have these neat and tidy terms for many long years.
The thing about thoughts and emotions like these, in my experience, is that they have stubborn roots. They dig in and grab hold. They build upon each other, reinforce one another, and become really hard to dislodge.
When we first moved onto the homestead, the dandelions were really hard to dislodge. Our soil was high in clay, highly compacted, lacking in organic matter. We would loosen up a garden bed, plant, and then watch it harden into stoneware in the summer sun. And it’s a daunting task to pry an uncompromising dandelion root out of baked clay!
But every year, we grow our soil. Everything we trim and clear to maintain our land, we chip and mulch back onto our garden beds. It’s a long, slow process, but every year, our garden soil gets a little softer. And the softer the soil gets, the easier the weeding becomes.💡
a garden lesson
becomes a life lesson
via dandelion
Because the thing about dandelions is that they are really beneficial! I don’t want to exterminate them. I want to create a space where they can thrive, but where the other things I’m cultivating can also thrive.
Anxieties and worries and self-criticism all have actual healthy purposes in our lives, too. They are signals and reminders, to help us assess and evaluate and make good decisions. But like my dandelion friends, they can become over-enthusiastic. They can run rampant and take over and choke out other elements of our internal landscape.
For a long time, I tackled my challengers head-on, individually - and there’s a lot of progress to be made that way! I chiseled those dandelion-thoughts right out of the baked clay of my mental gardens, one after another, and it was a healthy exercise, patiently meeting negative thoughts and emotions head-on with truth. But there is, ultimately, a plateau to this effort.
If I really wanted to create a nurturing space for the positive thoughts I was cultivating - for kindness and compassion and faith, for curiosity and optimism and gentle interest - I needed to start growing my soil.
So what can we do to feed the soil of our minds?
Look. Listen. Breathe. Notice.
Appreciate present beauties.
Be grateful for ordinary luxuries.
Recognize the flow and energy of life, seasons and cycles, in this great big world, and right down to the tiniest details.
Be curious. Be amazed. Often.
It takes some seasons. It’s not instant. The efforts you sow today are building differences far beyond the visible horizon. It’s a work undertaken with the patience and hope of a heart that sows a seed and trusts it will one day sprout, that keeps feeding the soil this year and trusts that next year, it will be just a little softer.
Even after years of building good soil (at least for me), intrusive thoughts and strong emotions still sprout. But they don’t harden into place. They don’t pile up and crowd out. They’re a little easier to wiggle free, and the work is more tranquil in the midst of healthy thoughts that have grown stronger and richer for the space and nourishment they’ve been receiving. I still have to weed - but I do notice that it used to be a lot harder work!
We will always have weeds, with all of their important benefits and frustrating challenges. We will always have things we need to tackle head-on, because it takes diligent effort to cultivate spaces that accommodate and nurture, build and accept, include and protect. It’s a life’s work! But the soil we build today will ease the labor that lies ahead.
Soak up the sunshine,
fill your lungs with hopeful expectation,
and breathe your wishes into summertime breezes.
Because that’s the thing about dandelions!
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We too, used to dig out dandelions, but then we attended a talk given by the then Prince of Wales's (now King Charles) head gardener, who said that the prince hated weeds to be grubbed from his lawns. The theory is that the leaves are always green and that the flowers are an insect's delight. As we know, the seedheads are things of great beauty. There are metaphors for life everywhere there.
Needless to say, we now leave all weeds alone in the lawns and now we have the yellows of dandelions, the blues of rampant ajuga and the mauves of thuggish violets - but we have a fabulous population of insects. Natural wildness all round. Perhaps another metaphor...
Just…wow, Sydney. Is this your Magnum opus or something? Incredible!